A truly terrible wardrobe malfunction

Posted 13 Jun 2011

Clothing, Daily Life | 4 Comments 

Oh, the terror and frustration of the ironing-proof crease that develops along the button-holes of certain shirts.

What would you do with a free cremation?

Posted 3 Jun 2011

Clothing, Language | 9 Comments 

Our latest free t-shirt contest!

Imagine that you are a brilliant marketing copy writer. You are sitting at your desk one Friday morning when your irate boss walks in the door.

Uncharacteristically red-faced and clearly extremely angry, he tells you that the client from the mortuary which ordered this mailer had been chewing him out all morning.

Your boss wants to know exactly what you were thinking when adding this phrase to the envelope.

“Free Pre-Paid Cremation! Details Inside”

How would you reply to your boss?

Throw up your suggested reply in the comments by Friday, June 10th. You’ve got a week to get clever!

A free chickenmonkeydog t-shirt will be shipped to whoever submits the editors’ favorite reply!

An OJ sort of dilemma

Posted 1 Apr 2011

Clothing, People | 1 Comment 

No, no, nothing like that. Just trying to purchase some gloves that fit.

On a recent trip to my local hardware store, I was looking to pick up a new pair of work gloves to help me tackle the spring yard work. Glancing down at my hand, I wondered ‘What size of glove should I try on first?’ I went with medium. Too small. Hmm … ok, onto large. Still too small. Really? Ok, onto extra large. Extra large?!? They fit!

So, how does one measure a hand? Bottom of the palm to the top of the middle finger? From an extended thumb to an extended pinky? Does finger meatiness play into it at all?

I am still reeling from having to purchase extra large sized gloves.

Your oldest piece of clothing

Posted 11 Feb 2011

Clothing, Daily Life | 3 Comments 

As I dressed today I realized that the span of years covered by the garments still in my regular rotation is at least five to ten years wide.

Between the clothes I bought last month and the oldest piece of clothing that I still regularly wear there must be at least five years. If you count the clothes that I only occasionally wear, it is easily ten years.

That seems like quite a spread in age for the clothes I wear, but I bet some folks have me beat by a long shot.

When you buy clothes, do you feel like you can predict which ones you’ll have for a long time and while ones are ‘short-termers’? I suppose to some extent educated guesses are possible, based on our prior experience, but I bet every one of us would find some surprises if they looked back and thought about how old some of their garments are.

In my case, team jerseys tend to stay with me for a long time because the material and color of the garment tends to be durable.

What’s the oldest piece of clothing you own that you still wear?

Winter Glove Gremlin

Posted 7 Jan 2011

Clothing, Daily Life, The Little Things | 4 Comments 

Losing one winter glove is simply to be a participant in the great cold weather ritual, by which lonely single gloves are distributed seemingly at random across the parking lots, sidewalks and crosswalks of frigid landscapes.

It happens.

And if I’d lost my winter glove out and about, I’d actually be somewhat proud to be a contributor to this great tradition.

However, that is not what happened to me and my glove.

Nope.

Last spring I packed my pair of gloves up nice and securely, to sit and wait for fall to end.  Then, when I went to retrieve them for the winter months of 2010, lo and behold, there was only one glove where last there were two.

I blame the winter glove gremlins, ruthlessly rooting through basements and closets and boxes and bags to surreptitiously separate two gloves that were meant to be together.

It’s shameful.